But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
