There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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