I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
