That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
