Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
