And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
