real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize