i think i have herpe
just one?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
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