so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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