Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
this hospital has no fireball
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Randomize
