we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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