So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Randomize
