I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
