"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
