its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
