It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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