you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
