Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
