Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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