Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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