just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
