ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
