YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
