You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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