What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
