FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
