do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
