i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
