I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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