There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
