Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Randomize