lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i would punch a child for taco bell
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
