I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
