It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
But theres a keg here and me gusta
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm like, not good at living.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
