you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
