Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
