ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
it hurts more in the daytime
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
