So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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