im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
