i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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