The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
