fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
