PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
