Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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