So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
