i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
