We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
