you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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