told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
