You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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